This is a place to submit secrets and thoughts about being a female to male (FTM or F2M) trans person, regardless of transition status. Some posts might be triggering. Tags being used:
tw: self harm
Please send in tags you would like to be used so your dash can continue to be a safe place for you.
3697) I don’t know how to choose a name. It seems like every trans*man or trans*woman has picked the gender variant of their birth name, but I don’t want to do that. I want a name that will make me feel content and confident when people talk to me.
3696) Whenever I read into information on bottom surgery, I don’t like any of my choices. I feel like none of them would make me feel right and secure as just an average man, and I don’t want to be hasty and regret my choice. I’m worried I’ll never get my chance at manhood.
3695) My friends are the most supportive people I could ask for. They’re constantly trying to educate themselves further on transgenderism and all it entitles, and they respect and protect me when others just want to hurt me. However, every time that I need some reassurance, it always comes around to the same line. “I don’t really see you as a boy or a girl.” I guess that’s better than just rejecting me, but it bothers me that they refuse to see me as a male.
3694) I’m rushing a fraternity in the fall. All my potential brothers have been very supportive, even going out of their way to see if I can join as a trans man, but I’ll be looking over my shoulder for one of brothers. He’s been way too curious about me. I’m afraid he’ll get drunk and try to do something.
3693) I’m afraid to tell my family and friends that I’m trans* I just feel like they wouldn’t accept me and that they would pretend like I said nothing and call me a girl. I’m a nerves wreck and I just can’t help but think about them not accepting me for me.
3692) I’m not ready to come out yet because I’m still underage and living home. I have to present as female, and I’m scared people will think I’m a transtrender or not really a guy because I deal with it. But I only manage to deal with it because it’s what I have to do to have a roof over my head.
3691) Once upon a time there was a young girl, who felt out of place. Why she didn’t know. She never liked dresses or having long hair, and she despised wearing bras too. It wasn’t until she seventeen when she fully discovered the truth. Piece by piece, HE figured it out and now all he’s afraid of, is coming out…his family is transphobic you see; to come out to them would be a true living hell. He’s different enough having Asperger’s and ADHD. One more difference would put them over the edge…
3691) I’m currently questioning myself about my gender identity and it’s very difficult. I’m also terrified of possibly saying the wrong things to a therapist who specializes in these things. I’m constantly arguing with myself about being honest or playing along with what most of them expect to hear. I somehow think being honest could de-qualify me of the label. I’ve heard it depends on the doctor and how well-trained they are but still, it feels like I have to pass an evaluation test. What if I fail?
3689) I started T past Oct., I have hair pretty much growing where I should. I lost weight. I’m stealth and no one questions it. I have a good job, a good place to live, and good friends. My family supports me, and my best friend is willing to use her credit c, to pay for top surgery. I’m really lucky My biggest problems are that I’m a gay social anxious 28-y-o horny virgin, and I’m afraid that I’ll be look down by others for my luck, and I’m terrified that no one will ever want me or want to fuck me.
3687) I see all these Trans* guys who are slim with broad shoulders and the like. And I’m just so curvy with huge hips and the smallest, invisible shoulders imaginable. I am also 5’2”. I never pass. And it makes me want to starve myself.